Roald Dahl Quotes 1–18 of 18 Quotes

Roald Dahl (13 September 1916 – 23 November 1990) was a British novelist and short story author of Norwegian descent, famous as a writer for both children and adults. His writing career began in 1942 when he compiled his experiences in World War II and had them published in the Post. In 2008 The Times placed Dahl 16th on its list of "The 50 greatest British writers since 1945". His short stories are known for their unexpected endings, and his children's books for their unsentimental, often very dark humour. Two of his most famous works are James and the Giant Peach and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

Below are 18 of 18 sourced Roald Dahl quotes. Sources and related information appear under each quote. Use the 'Cite this quote' link to get citation references.

“There is a trait in the Jewish character that does provoke animosity; maybe it's a kind of lack of generosity towards non-Jews. I mean there is always a reason why anti-anything crops up anywhere; even a stinker like Hitler didn't just pick on them for no reason.”

— Roald Dahl

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Quote source: As quoted in New Statesman (1983); partly quoted in "The Candy Man" by Margaret Talbot in The New Yorker (11 July 2005)

“A person is a fool to become a writer. His only compensation is absolute freedom. He has no master except his own soul and that, I am sure, is why he does it.”

— Roald Dahl

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Quote source: "Goodbye school" in Boy: Tales of Childhood (1984)

“It was all this, I think, that made me begin to have doubts about religion and even about God. If this person, I kept telling myself, was one of God’s chosen salesmen on earth, then there must be something very wrong about the whole business.”

— Roald Dahl

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Quote source: "The Headmaster" in Boy: Tales of Childhood (1984)

“It began in 1982 when the Israelis invaded Lebanon. They killed 22,000 civilians when they bombed Beirut. It was very much hushed up in the newspapers because they are primarily Jewish-owned. I’m certainly anti-Israeli and I’ve become antisemitic in as much as that you get a Jewish person in another country like England strongly supporting Zionism. I think they should see both sides. It’s the same old thing: we all know about Jews and the rest of it. There aren’t any non-Jewish publishers anywhere, they control the media – jolly clever thing to do – that’s why the president of the United States has to sell all this stuff to Israel … ””

— Roald Dahl

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Quote source: 1990 interview with The Independent, quoted November 2018 by The Guardian

“"There's enough chocolate in there to fill every bathtub in the entire country! And all the swimming pools as well!"”

— Roald Dahl

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Quote source: Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (1964) Ch. 15, "The Chocolate Room"

“"It is very difficult to phone people in China, Mr. President," said the Postmaster General, "The country is so full of Wings and Wongs, every time you wing you get the wong number."”

— Roald Dahl

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Quote source: Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator (1972) Ch. 4, "The President" (p. 34 in the 1984 Bantam edition)

“"A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men.””

— Roald Dahl

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More on this quote: Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator (1972) Ch. 12, 'Back to The Chocolate Factory' (p.88 in the Paperback edition (1998) from Puffin)
• Not original to this work, the proverb dates from at least the 18th century.

“Grown-ups are quirky creatures, full of quirks and secrets.”

— Roald Dahl

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Source: Danny, the Champion of the World (1975)

“A Message to Children Who Have Read This Book - When you grow up and have children of your own, do please remember something important: a stodgy parent is no fun at all. What a child wants and deserves is a parent who is SPARKY.”

— Roald Dahl

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Source: Danny, the Champion of the World (1975)

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“"The matter with human beans," the BFG went on, "is that they is absolutely refusing to believe in anything unless they is actually seeing it right in front of their own schnozzles."”

— Roald Dahl

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Source: The BFG (1982)

“"Dreams is very mystical things," the BFG said. "Human beans is not understanding them at all. Not even their brainiest professors is understanding them."”

— Roald Dahl

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Quote source: The BFG (1982) "Cool Dreams"

“Two rights don't equal a left.”

— Roald Dahl

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Source: The BFG (1982)

“"Ah, but they is not killing their own kind," the BFG said. "Human beans is the only animals that is killing their own kind."”

— Roald Dahl

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Source: The BFG (1982)

“It doesn't matter who you are or what you look like so long as somebody loves you.”

— Roald Dahl

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Quote source: The Witches (1983) "The Heart of a Mouse"

“Little Billy’s mother was always telling him exactly what he was allowed to do and what he was not allowed to do. All the things he was allowed to do were boring. All the things he was not allowed to do were exciting. One of the things he NEVER NEVER was allowed to do, the most exciting of them all, was to go out through the garden gate all by himself and explore the world beyond.”

— Roald Dahl

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Source: The Minpins (1991)

“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.”

— Roald Dahl

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Source: The Minpins (1991)

“My candle burns at both ends; It will not last the night; But, ah, my foes, and, oh, my friends — It gives a lovely light.”

Misattributed to Roald Dahl

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Quote source: Edna St. Vincent Millay, in "First Fig" from A Few Figs from Thistles (1920); said to be a motto Roald Dahl lived by.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger Bruce Lee Conor McGregor John Wooden Michael Jordan Mike Tyson Muhammad Ali Vince Lombardi Yogi Berra

Authors

Alan Watts Albert Camus Anne Frank Ayn Rand Barack Obama Benjamin Franklin Bill Gates C. S. Lewis Carl Jung Carl Sagan Charles Bukowski Che Guevara Donald Trump Dr. Seuss E. E. Cummings Eckhart Tolle Edgar Allan Poe Emily Dickinson Ernest Hemingway F. Scott Fitzgerald Friedrich Nietzsche George Bernard Shaw George Carlin George Orwell Goethe Groucho Marx Haruki Murakami Helen Keller Henry David Thoreau Hunter S. Thompson Isaac Newton J. K. Rowling J. R. R. Tolkien Jane Austen John Green John Muir Jordan Peterson Kahlil Gibran Karl Marx Kurt Vonnegut Lao Tzu Machiavelli Mark Twain Maya Angelou Neil deGrasse Tyson Oscar Wilde Rabindranath Tagore Ralph Waldo Emerson Roald Dahl Robert Frost Rumi Shakespeare Stephen Hawking Sylvia Plath Theodore Roosevelt Thich Nhat Hanh Tony Robbins Voltaire Walt Whitman Winston Churchill Zig Ziglar

Businesspeople

Al Capone Bill Gates Coco Chanel Donald Trump Elon Musk Henry Ford Kanye West Michael Jordan Oprah Winfrey Richard Branson Steve Jobs Thomas Edison Walt Disney Warren Buffett

Coaches

John Wooden Tony Robbins Vince Lombardi Yogi Berra Zig Ziglar

Comedians

Charlie Chaplin George Carlin Groucho Marx Mae West Mitch Hedberg Robin Williams Will Smith

Explorers

Christopher Columbus Marco Polo Theodore Roosevelt

Fictional Characters

Albus Dumbledore The Joker Peter Pan Rocky Balboa Yoda

Inventors

Benjamin Franklin Elon Musk Leonardo da Vinci Nikola Tesla Thomas Edison

Military Leaders

Abraham Lincoln Adolf Hitler Alexander the Great Che Guevara Genghis Khan George Washington Julius Caesar Napoleon Sun Tzu Theodore Roosevelt Winston Churchill

Musicians & Singers

Beyoncé Bob Dylan Bob Marley Drake Ed Sheeran Eminem J. Cole Jimi Hendrix John Lennon Justin Bieber Kanye West Kendrick Lamar Kurt Cobain Lana Del Rey Lil Wayne Michael Jackson Taylor Swift Tupac Will Smith Wiz Khalifa

Philosophers

Alan Watts Albert Camus Aristotle Ayn Rand Confucius Dalai Lama Friedrich Nietzsche Henry David Thoreau Karl Marx Lao Tzu Machiavelli Marcus Aurelius Noam Chomsky Plato Ralph Waldo Emerson Socrates Thomas Jefferson Voltaire

Poets

Charles Bukowski E. E. Cummings Edgar Allan Poe Emily Dickinson Friedrich Nietzsche Henry David Thoreau J. R. R. Tolkien Kahlil Gibran Rabindranath Tagore Ralph Waldo Emerson Robert Frost Rumi Shakespeare Walt Whitman

Politicians

A. P. J. Abdul Kalam Abraham Lincoln Adolf Hitler Alexander the Great Arnold Schwarzenegger Barack Obama Ben Carson Benjamin Franklin Confucius Donald Trump Eleanor Roosevelt George Washington Hillary Clinton Isaac Newton John F. Kennedy Julius Caesar Machiavelli Marcus Aurelius Michelle Obama Napoleon Nelson Mandela Ronald Reagan Theodore Roosevelt Thomas Jefferson Winston Churchill

Polymaths

Benjamin Franklin Goethe Leonardo da Vinci Rabindranath Tagore Thomas Jefferson

Religious & Spiritual

Buddha Dalai Lama Gandhi Jesus Martin Luther King Mother Teresa Muhammad Osho Pope Francis Swami Vivekananda Thich Nhat Hanh

Scientists

A. P. J. Abdul Kalam Albert Einstein Aristotle Isaac Newton Leonardo da Vinci Marie Curie Neil deGrasse Tyson Nikola Tesla Stephen Hawking Thomas Edison