Timequake Quotes
Autobiographical novels, Metafictional works, American novels, Postmodern novels
Top Quotes
“If this isn't nice, what is?”
“Western Civilization's second unsuccessful attempt to commit suicide.”
“All persons, living and dead, are purely coincidental.”
“In real life, as in Grand Opera, arias only make hopeless situations worse.”
“If your brains were dynamite, there wouldn’t be enough to blow your hat off.”
“Science never cheered up anyone. The truth about the human situation is just too awful.”
“Wikipedia: Timequake”
“"We are here to help each other get through this thing, whatever it is."”
“Kilgore's Creed: "You were sick, but now you're well again, and there's work to do."”
“Extenuating circumstance to be mentioned on Judgment Day: We never asked to be born in the first place.”
“Listen: We are here on Earth to fart around. Don't let anybody tell you any different!”
“There is no way a beautiful woman can live up to what she looks like for any appreciable length of time.”
“All male writers, incidentally, no matter how broke or otherwise objectionable, have pretty wives. Somebody should look into this.”
“If you really want to hurt your parents, and you don’t have nerve enough to be a homosexual, the least you can do is go into the arts.”
“You want to know why I don’t have AIDS, why I'm not HIV-positive like so many other people? I don’t fuck around. It’s as simple as that.”
“Let me note that Kilgore Trout and I have never used semicolons. They don't do anything, don't suggest anything. They are transvestite hermaphrodites.”
“I like to sleep. I published a new requiem for old music in another book, in which I said it was no bad thing to want sleep for everyone as an afterlife.”
“I am eternally grateful [...] for my knack of finding in great books, some of them very funny books, reason enough to feel honored to be alive, no matter what else might be going on.”
“I will say, too, that lovemaking, if sincere, is one of the best ideas Satan put in the apple she gave to the serpent to give to Eve. The best idea in that apple, though, is making jazz.”
“It used to be said of a man who had suffered a catastrophic setback in his line of work that he had been handed his head on a platter. We are being handed our heads with tweezers now.”